Demons

Demons

“Stop, this is getting ridiculous, there is no way we can continue.”
“You might be right, I’m starting to feel really tired..”
“Exactly, this is something that nobody should put themselves through. All you have to do is step off the road and that will be the end of it.”
“Maybe your right..but then again. Maybe you’re not. I have been working hard for the last 20minutes to get to this position, I’m not going to waste all that effort.”
“But you’re starting to slow down anyway, there is no way you’ll make it to the finish.”
“I’ve trained for months for this, I’ve sacrificed a lot to put myself in a position where I can do well here. I’m not going to let you talk me out of it.”
“Ok, well lets just slow down to a more comfortable speed. Thats what everyone else will be doing.”
“Exactly! Everyone else is slowing down, that means if I maintain this speed then I will pass them.”
“But there is 10minutes left, this pain is not going to get any easier if you don;t slow down, if anything, it will get worse.”
“But it will be worth it. When we cross that finish line, I will be rewarded for this, and if I’m not, then I will have learned something that will help me be rewarded in the future.”
“I can’t let you do it. It takes too much. More than we have.”
“We’ve been in this position numerous times before, you know that we can pull through and make it to the finish, think of those times we have done it before. Think of the people that will be let down if we don’t do it. Think of all those people that said we won’t be able to do it. We are proving them right. But most importantly, think of all the reasons why we should do it. We can become something that nobody else can ever take away from us. Superiority. The numbers do not lie. We have a chance of being better than we could ever imagined. Of being faster than we could ever dream. No matter what happens, this is something that can never be taken away from us.”
“But…”
“No buts, we don’t have long to go and we are getting stronger and stronger as we continue. Trust your training. Trust yourself.”
“I hate this.”
“I’m not saying it will be easy. I’m saying it will be worth it. Besides, if it was easy, everyone would do it.”

These are the thoughts that enter my head during any race I decide to run. Some days negative thoughts are more difficult to remove, they overrule any positivity and my performance and overall emotion is consequently impacted in a negative way in the long term, despite that little bit of respite in the short term, by allowing the negative thoughts to control me. I work on controlling these thoughts, I believe in the power of belief and I believe in the power of the mind to influence performance. After all, they think the secret is in the legs, but the real secret stems from strength of mind.

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